WHAT KIND OF COOKIE ARE YOU?

I was a low fat jammy-dodger, sprinkled with hemp seeds!

REASSESSMENTS

The mysteriousness of a found object is one of the things that fascinates me. Bureaucratic forms, instruction manuals, and random sets of numbers, become esoteric poetry.

MUST LOVE DOGS

Come on! what kind of pedant would put corrective margin notes on a kids poster ?

NATIVE MAN

Found this on the way to the liquor store, it's a good day for finding stuff, it's the day after recycling, bits of paper blow out of the box or are dropped by the pick up guys.

NOTE TO SELF

THEY'RE COMING FOR YOU

SEXY BEAST

I found this where I find most notes of this nature...... stuck to my bedroom door! and I have absolutely no idea what it means.

ZOMBIE SEX SLAVE

These were found in the basement of a house I used to live in. Like many basements in many cities it had been converted into a band practice space, and amongst the beer cans, broken drumsticks and cracked cymbals, I found a stack of papers. Praise be to him!

ZOMBIE SEX SLAVE

I call on satan and the serpent
as I weave my spell
your flesh becomes my servant
and your soul is cast to hell

(chorus) your a zombie sex slave to me
you'll be a zombie sex slave for eternity

theres no escape from this pain
I fuck your mind and your brain
I rape your carcass and your soul
I penetrate your rotting hole

your flesh is now an empty shell
your soul screams and burns in hell

get down on your knees
give praise to the serpent
sacrifice your children in the
name of satan

OOOOAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH

chorus

YOUR NEIGHBOURS

I love this one, there is so much going on. The choice of headed letter paper has an audacious flare that I can't help but admire.

A friend of mine found this(thanks T.) and passed it on to me today, it's my new favorite!

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DIRTY DOODLE # 1

I found this, where I find most things, in the street.

"What is not in the open street is false, derived, that is to say, literature."
Henry Miller.

This would have to be in my top ten of favorite found notes. Most notes exchanged between roommates are tinged with a certain passive aggressive undercurrent, especially those written on Post-it®'s

Dave, It appears we have a fruit fly problem. Thus when you take out the garbage:

#1 Make sure the lid has not been opened for a while and all fruit flys are inside.
#2 Pick up whole container of garbage can (also grab a clean bag) and take the unopened unit outside.
#3 Close the patio door.
#4 Pull out garbage tie it up, replace clean bag.
#5 Wait a few minutes for the flys to disperse, then open door fast, bring in stuff, and close fast.

I found this yesterday in a used book: In Watermelon Sugar by Richard Brautigan. With the help of a friend who has a gift for deciphering difficult to read handwriting, we were able to come up with this translation.

though our window
I see
one of the local toughs
walking gorilla like
down the street
he spits in the gutter

oh how I'd like to
kick his balls up in
though that snot filled snout

But I catch myself short
poets just don't go around
kicking people except with words